The First Day of The Rest of My Life

The new normal.  My husband has been sick since November.  Well, not really since November, but mostly.  Had a really bad cough and went to the doctor - got the typical antibiotic and was "cured."

Then came gum surgery in December.  Complain, complain, ow, ow.  The usual man stuff.   Cough essentially gone.

Fast forward.  A little, not a lot to January.  Cough is back.  Back with a vengeance.  Fast forward again.  Add to the cough.  Vomitting while coughing.  I hate when I vomit and I hate it more watching someone else vomit.  Add diarrhea.  Ow, my stomach is bothering me.  Add some my balls hurt.  Do you think it's from shoveling?  Then throw in a little my back hurts, should I take something....

...and walah we are back at the doctor.

Hey doc, think I should have a blood-test?  I guess, if you want one, they answered.  Blood drawn - then results came back.

Here's some penecillen we'll retest your blood in a few days.  Why, who knows?  Fast forward just a smidge to yesterday.  Blood drawn.  Wait til tomorrow for your results.

We're at today.  Like today today.  The results are back and your white cell blood count is higher today than it was.  You need to get a CT scan on your chest and abdomen.  What are you checking for?  Well, there's an infection of some sort so we need to find out what it is.  O.K. my husband told the doctor.  Text me with this info, then left his office taking a half a day.

Just gotten to my weekly appointment with my therapist (as if where you are doesn't matter) when my husband called.  "Did you get my text?" he wanted to know.  I hadn't just yet.

Skipping ahead....I am on hold waiting for the results of the ultrasound.  The ultrasound I haven't mentioned yet, but if it's still relevant after I hang up I'll discuss it.  My heart is pounding, and I feel like I can't breath.

My husband is downstairs with our three children.  They are so innocent.  They aren't aware that our lives might be in a spiral as we speak.  Or should I say, as I type.   My song is singing to our youngest daughter.  My oldest daughter just came to me and kissed me for no reason.  If it were any other day, at any other time I would feel so lucky.

.....still on hold.